Cats and Dogs
by 0neWhoWanders
Summary: Blake is in trouble. As the only member of Team RWBY still in Beacon for the break, she is tasked with her hardest and most dangerous mission to date. Dog-sitting Zwei.
1. In which Blake fears for Her Safety

**Welcome to Cats and Dogs! A nice little story that I hope you all enjoy!**

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No. No no. No no no. This could not be happening. This was proof that gods existed and were punishing her for her past crimes. There could be no other reason. Blake stared in silent horror at Ruby's words on her scroll. Her faunus ears twitched.

"Hi Blake! Yang and I are stuck in Patch for a little while longer (thanks rain for washing away the bridge), so we won't be joining you in Beacon for the rest of the break. We didn't really know we would be running late and Yang had the brilliant idea to send Zwei over through the mail so he could arrive when we did. But with this delay, Zwei will be in Beacon before we can get there. Would you please, please, please, pretty please with a chocolate chip and sprinkles cookie on top doggy-sit Zwei until we get back? Thanks Blake you're the best!"

How Ruby could text so happily at a time like this. The shear madness of that little girl had no bounds! Was this Ruby and Yang punishing her for not telling them she was a faunus earlier? Could it be a big elaborate setup to one of Yang's terrible pranks or puns?

Was there any way out of this madness?

Her eyes darted around the room. Books were everywhere. Not that she had grown too lazy to clean their room, but she had been living on her own in Beacon for the last week and if it was just her, there was no real need to pick up every book she finished. There were some clothes on the ground as well. But the books! If Zwei got a hold of even a single one, he could ruin it forever! Not only ripped pages but- Blake shuddered. Dog slobber.

Give her a fight with thousand grimm instead of dog slobber!

Blake tugged on her long hair and screamed nonsensical words into the air. Zwei was coming. That mangy monster was going to be staying in her room. There was no Weiss, no Ruby and no Yang to save her from the beast. How could she escape!

No. She smacked herself in the face. No escape. She had to think about this logically. Yes, Blake was the logical, intuitive one. So start acting like it!

Okay, first thing's first. She had to save her babies. Books! Blake scowled at herself. If Ruby got Crescent Rose as her baby, then Blake's babies were her books. There is no way in hell she would let her books get ruined. Easy enough. All she needed to do was find a hiding spot that a tiny corgi could never reach. Like the top shelf of their closet! Perfect spot Blake. Only a mastermind like you could think of such a spot.

Now, she just needed to collect the books of the ground…

And the books under her bed…

And the books _holding up_ her bed…

This is going to be harder than she thought.

What to do. What to do…

Blake felt herself pacing around the room, enjoying the extra floor space now that the books were cleaned up and hidden on the top shelf. The ones holding up her bed had to remain in place. There was absolutely no way in hell she would attempt to use rope like Ruby and Weiss did. She was not even sure how Weiss could sleep at night knowing that at any moment a bed could fall and crush her.

Maybe it was just being partners with Ruby that made being crushed so tempting. Then again, Blake _was_ partners with Ruby's much more disastrous sister, so maybe being crushed wouldn't be half bad.

No. Game face. This was war! She had to get ready and protect herself from the beast. What could she do. At least, she turned to her books for wisdom. Fortifications! Walls! That's what she needed to do. If Vale could keep out the monsters of grimm with walls, then she could keep out a stupid slobbery mutt with one too. Ingenious! Blake gave herself a mental high five.

She'd be ready for anything Zwei could throw at her.

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**As you can probably guess, this story will most likely some have fairly short chapters. Hopefully that doesn't turn too many of you away from it. Either way, thanks for reading chapter 1. This story will be 8 chapters long total, with no epilogue.**


	2. In which Zwei Ruins Blake's Life

**Wow! Over 230 people have read this little story of mine. Thank you all for that and I hope you enjoyed. Anyways, without further ado. On to chapter 2!**

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Books? Secure.

Fortifications? Built and reinforced.

Extra provisions in case she is overrun and forced to hide? Enough to last three days.

Okay, Blake was finally able to calm down. She felt good. Proud even at what she had accomplished in only twenty-four hours. She had not had any time to sleep, but it was so worth it. There would be no way in hell that that dog would ever be able to reach her side of the room. Not with the walls she had constructed. Made from extra mattresses from empty rooms, plenty of duct tape and bubble wrap.

Zwei was more likely to bounce off of her fortifications than barrel through them. No she just needed to wait until Zwei arri-

There was a knock on her door, followed by the sound of a metal tube fall onto the ground with a loud THONK! Blake froze.

Speak of the devil and he shall reply.

It was a metal tube. Small, but no different from the container that Zwei arrived in that fateful first time. Blake gulped, steadying her shaky nerves. She took a solemn step forward, resigning herself to what was about to come.

_Maybe it will be easier,_ she lied to herself. _Maybe because he is used to me, he will leave me alone and I can spend this week by myself and the mutt- dog- Zwei will spend his time by himself. Yes. Let's go with that._

She reached down, lifting the metal canister which was obviously much too light for what was inside. Blake slowly unscrewed the cap. Then, after a deep breath, tilted the canister over.

Immediately, boxes and boxes of food poured out, covering the floor with the horrid smell. And that was it.

"What." She spoke to the air, relief and hope filling her voice. "That's it. I'm free. I'm fr-!"

As soon as she cheered, a shadow bolted from the canister, disappearing somewhere in the room. Blake spun around. What was that?

Her eyes caught the faint glimpse of movement passed Ruby's bed. She stepped towards it.

"Come out, come out wherever you are." She warned, reaching behind her back for her blade.

Ahh!

With sudden speed and ferocity a thirty pound ball of fluff tackled her to the ground, slobbering her face, scratching at her chest and then bolting off. Zwei ran headfirst into a mattress currently being used as a wall to Blake's bed, ricocheting off and continued running in the opposite direction.

Zwei was barking like mad, darting around the room faster that Doctor Oobleck, even after a pot of coffee. Slamming into the closet door, it swung open from the force.

Oh, oh no.

Continuing on his warpath, the tiny corgi leapt onto Weiss's bed, then onto Blake's shoulders and then up onto Ruby's bed. Without time to think, Blake jumped after the mutt, only to be pushed back onto the floor. A cookie shaped mark on her forehead where Zwei had hit her.

"Zwei! Get out of Ruby's hidden cookie stash!"

"BARK BARK BARK!" Came the happy reply, as Zwei chowed down on a dozen strawberry oatmeal cookies.

And then he was off again. Zipping around the room, throwing clothes and paper flying through the air.

"No Zwei! Not my-"

CRASH!

A shelf containing way too many books collapsed as Zwei ran by.

"Get away from the-"

Papers flew up and around Blake, as she scrambled to stop the destruction of her precious books.

"No get away from that! It's a first addition! And that, it's signed! No! Not Ninja's of Love!"

"Did I hear Ninja's of Love?" Came the voice of Nora from outside in the hall.

"You heard nothing!" Blake shouted back immediately, her attention flitting back to the four-legged devil.

Out in the hall, Nora was sitting in front of the door cross-legged, a bowl of popcorn in her lap, which she was snacking on happily. Sitting with her back against a wall and facing the closed door to RWBY's room, she listened intently at the crashes and shouts of Blake and Zwei.

"Hey Nora, whatcha up to?" Asked Jaune, hands filled with textbooks.

"Oh, just listening to Blake lose a fight to Zwei."

"Should we help her?" Concern filled Jaune. Nora shook her head cheerily.

"Nope! Ruby called me to get JNPR to help Blake with handling Zwei until she gets back."

"So… shouldn't we help?"

"Nah, this is much more fun."

A loud crash followed by a bang. The door opened up slowly. Blake's hair was a mess and she was covered in dog food. Crawling on her hands and knees, she looked up at Nora, just as she popped a kernel in her mouth, giving it a good crunch.

Paying no mind to the terrified and defeated faunus, Nora looked over the girl to watch as Zwei lifted his leg and began to pee on Blake's bed.


	3. In Which Zwei Plays Tag

**Thanks IanAlphaAxel for the kind words. I'm glad you're enjoying it!**

**So, it seems like I accidentally rhymed in my little blurb last chapter. I honestly did not spot it until I was getting ready to post this.**

**Here is chapter 3! It's a fun one, believe me!**

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It was a beautiful day in Beacon Academy. The sun was shining, there was not a single cloud in the sky and students were slowly arriving from their breaks, hoping to spend a few days back at school to re-acclimate. Those who had stayed were walking around enjoying the great warm weather. Some were lounging under trees, other reading books and others talking with their friends. Some were even training with their weapons out on the grass or courtyard. In all, there was little that could have made the day less picturesque.

To Blake, this day could not be anything less than hell on Remnant.

The girl was exhausted, sweat covering her face, her hair strewn unceremoniously around her. Her eyes were drooping, and she occasionally tripped on her own feet. But still, should could not stop. No, she had to run. She had to hide. A demon was chasing her.

She jumped onto the roof of the training arena, using her shadow-clone semblance to fake movement to the right, instead veering to the left, diving behind an air conditioning system in order to catch her breath.

She dare not look behind her. It could see everything. Hear everything. She sucked in air, holding her breath to not give anything away. Her heart beat faster than it had ever done before. She heard a footstep. Quiet.

Cold.

Calculating.

Another one. It was closer now.

Blake's head was on a swivel, looking in every direction. It was above her, she looked up at its eyes. Eyes as black as a grimm, filled with nothing but evil. It's strong jaws could tear out her throat with little thought and they both knew it. She scrambled forward, tripping, scraping her knees and hands. But still she pressed on. Those were not the only cuts she had that day from her escape. She cried for help, but nobody around her paid her any mind. Instead, they watched and laughed.

Their minds had been invaded! There was no other reason she could think of. A school full of the best and brightest huntsman and huntresses in training, and nobody could tell how much danger she was in. It was like they were blind and deaf to such horrible dangers. Why could no one see her anguish? Her fear? Or the great and terrible beast with a row of razor-sharp teeth which chased her so? There was nothing left she could do but run for her life. Run and run until she at last dropped dead and that monster could finally tear her limb from limb. Devouring her entirely.

She vaulted over bench as the monster circled in front of her, standing on its hind legs in a show of dominance. Screeching to a halt, she changed directions and fled in the opposite direction. The creature growled and shouted out a battle cry, continuing its endless torment.

"BARK!"

It was no use! Blake screamed and dove over Zwei, as it reached up to nip at her bow. With just a little luck, the dog missed her bow. With just a bit more luck, Zwei would have missed her completely. Instead, Blake got a face full of dog spit.

"Bleh!" She screamed, clawing at her face to remove the fluid. Her eyes opened in panic as she watched Zwei charge at her once more.

"Get it away from me!" She screamed, arms flailing behind her.

Nora sat down calmly on a bench, one hand holding a plate stacked high with pancakes, the other clutching a cup of orange juice. She watched with wide eyes as Blake ran forward and backward across the Beacon grass, as Ruby's tiny corgi chased after her. Tongue out, yipping happily at the exercise, even as he tripped over his tiny legs. Nora popped a whole pancake into her mouth and chewed happily.

"Hey Ren? Did I miss something?"

"I believe that Blake is playing tag with Zwei." Ren informed his partner, leaning against her shoulders from behind.

"Huh. Does Blake know that?" Nora cocked her head.

"No, I don't believe so… Would you suggest helping her?"

"Not until I send Yang a video of this." Nora said, whipping out her scroll once she placed down her drink.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Blake screeched, running passed Nora's camera.

"Yang is so totally gonna love this."

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**So, as you can probably tell by now, each chapter is fairly independent from the others. Written essentially as little shorts about what happens each day that Blake is tasked with keeping a watch over Zwei. I hope you've been enjoying them so far. If anybody feels like they want to write up a short or two with the same premise, I'd love to read them and share links to them with everybody!**

**And if you are an artist, I would be so grateful to give this story the cover art it deserves.**

**Anyways, that's all from me. Just a handful of these left.**


	4. In Which Zwei Forgets to Blink

**Guest - Sorry! No Knightshade or any sort of romance in this fic. Unless you count Zwei's puppy-love for Blake (I am sorry for the pun. You can slap me now)**

**AlcatrazDGold - Glad you are enjoying it so far.**

**IanAlphaAxel - You're too kind. I don't plan on stopping it when we are at the halfway point**

**Onto Chapter four. A chapter you all will adore.**

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There was a silent tenseness in Team JNPR's room. Jaune glanced at Pyrrha, who in turn glanced at Ren. Ren shrugged and glanced at Nora, who did not notice as she was too busy smiling, her scroll capturing the oh so important moment in front of her. Each of team JNPR were sitting on their respective beds, as the floor was being taken up by the fiercest of competitions.

"How long?" Jaune loudly whispered.

"Two minutes and twenty-three seconds." Nora replied dutifully, her scroll not wavering from the scene in front of her.

"Is that some sort of world record or something?"

"No idea, but that's why I'm recording it."

Blake face was straining under the pressure. Tears filled her vision and sweat beaded down her neck. And still, she would not budge from the task at hand. It was too important. Not only was her dignity in jeopardy, but so too was her reputation. If she lost here, there was no telling what could happen to her.

As she gazed harshly at the face of her unwavering enemy, doubt began creeping into her mind. As did the faint sounds of a ticking clock.

"Jaune, if you don't turn off that infernal racket, I will strangle you." Her words were spat out through clenched teeth, spewing forth as much venom as humanly -faunusly- possibly.

Jaune clicked off his own scroll. The image of an old grandfather clock flickering off with it. "Oops, sorry. Just trying to raise the stakes."

Team JNPR just continued to watch in silence as Blake stared at her opponent. The two had just walked into their room, told them to shut up, plopped down on the floor and watched each other silently. For almost three minutes.

It would have been annoying if not for the fact that one Zwei was panting happily across from the extremely stressed Blake Belladonna. It was a battle for the ages. Two fierce opponents locked in a silent battle of wills. One, a master sleuth and saboteur. A huntress in training with a mysterious past as dark and peculiar as the girl herself. The other: a 25-pound corgi who had his cute little tongue flopping playfully out of his mouth.

Never before had two equals stood against one another.

And it looked like the cat faunus was starting to crack. Her eyes began to droop, only to shoot back open as Blake mustered as much energy as she could. Zwei, much to her chagrin, cocked his head. His tongue falling to the other side of his canine mouth. He inched closer and whined lightly, almost breaking Blake's trained concentration.

"Trying to trick me. It won't work, mutt. Nothing can break my iron-willed focus."

Jaune held both hands over his mouth, his face red, his own tears streaming down his face as he blocked out the signs of his laughter. Blake; the cool-headed and talented huntress. Was talking to a dog. Even Pyrrha lightly held her fingers to her lips as she giggled, a short blush appearing on her cheeks. Ren was as calm as ever. Watching the two with a stern fascination, wondering what the stakes were. There was no way Blake of all people would engage in such a foolish competition for no reward.

And if the reward was high, so too were the opposing stakes.

Nora just inched her scroll's camera closer to Blake's face, giving her own dialogue to the competition.

"And Blake blazes passed the four minute mark, with Zwei following at her tail. I mean heels. Blake doesn't have a tail, just cute cat ears hidden under a bow." Nora whispered, her scroll almost pushing into Blake's cheek.

"Nora, please shut up."

"No can do. An event like this has GOT to be recorded. Too important. And what if you blink at the same time? Gotta have recorded footage to see who won in the split second." Nora smiled at her iron clad and entirely made-up logic. The video was of course being streamed directly to Yang's scroll.

Blake grumbled, unable to find fault in her reasoning. "I guess…"

The competition continued, minutes passing by at incredible speeds. That is to say, so slowly that Blake felt every god damn second pass by. She was on the verge of tearing her hair from her skull just to keep from blinking. How was that dog so good? There was no way that Zwei had trained for this- Ruby.

She groaned internally. Of course, Ruby would train her dog not to blink. That is such a Ruby thing to do. How she was able to sit down and stare at him for long enough to train him; that was a different story. But there was no doubt in her mind that Zwei's inhuman ability to not blink was Ruby's fault.

"And Zwei wins!" Nora shouted extatically, pulling Blake from her inner thoughts. She looked around wildly.

"No I didn't! I did not blink!"

"Got the footage right here, Blakey." Nora squealed, shoving her scroll into the huntress's face. Her cat ears twitching as she caught herself blink subconsciously.

"Dammit… Alright Zwei. You win, get your reward."

Zwei happily yipped and trotted over to Blake and promptly sat in her lap. Blake began to pet his head, grumbling loudly with every stroke.

Angrily telling nobody in particular, "Know that I hate every second of this."


	5. In Which Zwei Assists a Professor

**Hello all! We're onto the final stretch! Just a few more of these left so I hope everyone is enjoying it. And I can't believe this story hit over 1,000 hits!**

**Arno Wisp: I never fully decided what Blake would have won. What do you think she would have wanted? I like to think that Blake would have stuck Zwei back in his canister if she won and leave him there until Ruby returned.**

**Chinaluv: Thanks! But I would consider it pawsome. A paws-itively delightful tail. A story about Zwei going mutts! Blake having plenty of cattitutde and needing a va-cat-ion after this week of dog-sitting. Sorry for pulling out my inner Yang. You can slap me now.**

**Anyways, how will Blake survive, chapter number five!**

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Blake was not in a good mood. One might say she was in a terrible one. One of those moods you get; not because of anything currently happening to you, but from the immense fear of something far worse happening in the future.

It was that fear that had the young faunus tearing apart her room, looking for a mangy little corgi. It was one thing to complain about the dog. It was even okay if the dog was trapped somewhere. Maybe locked in a maximum-security prison with shoot-on-sight soldiers guarding him. The thought almost made Blake drool in appreciation. No, it was quite another thing to lose said mutt entirely.

Oh god, what would she do when Yang found out? Her face blanched for what had to have been the tenth time that morning. What would she do when Ruby found out? Ruby's pouting face was legendary around both Team RWBY and Beacon. There was no escape from the shame of seeing the young girl so upset. That red-head had weaponized her pout to great advantage in the past. Blake enjoyed seeing her use it on teachers and Yang alike. But being on the receiving end, there was little worse.

And don't get Blake started on an angry Ruby. An angry Ruby is a nasty Ruby. She had long since surpassed her teacher; one Yang Xiao Long, in pettiness. Blake had only just found her copy of Ninjas of Love after what Ruby had done to it.

And that was only over misplacing a bolt for Crescent Rose! Losing Zwei would be infinitely worse! She had to find that dog or die trying!

Her room was a mess. Blankets and pillows thrown every which-way. Clothes tossed out of corgi sized drawers, and every nook and cranny checked for any signs of fur, spit or dog-like sounds. But, much to her chagrin, nothing. There was no Zwei anywhere.

That only left one more place he could be. Blake's expression soured and her eyes squinted in anger.

"GOD DAMMIT NORA OPEN THAT DOOR RIGHT NOW!" Blake yelled for what must have been the first time since starting Beacon. Pounding on the door, she heard the small insanity filled redhead shout back, "I don't want what you're selling! Unless it's pancakes, in which case I'll have three… dozen!"

Blake heard a scuffle in the room, followed by the voices of Ren, Jaune and Pyrrha. Unable to make out what any of them were saying, she listened to the tempo of their discussion. It was quick… Heated. Almost as if they were in the process of hiding something. Hiding something important from her before she found a way into the room to take it back.

Her face turned red, her ears steaming. "Give it back to me! Before I rip your spine out through your mouth and feed it to Zwei!"

The door pounding continued. It opened up just a crack. "Blake. Nora is very sorry, but she told me to tell you… Ya, Nora. I heard you. Stop whispering in my ear. Anyways, Nora said she can't come to the phone right now as she is stuck in a… syrup and sprinkles related accident. She promises that as soon as she fixes the issue, she will return what you have lost."

Blake shut her eyes and counted to ten in her head. Anything to calm herself down. The guy is Ruby's friend. The guy is Ruby's friend. Kill the guy and Ruby will be even more angry. She repeated to herself, under her breath.

"What was that about killing Ruby's friend?"

Maybe she said it louder than she meant to.

"Jaune. I know we don't talk much. And I can assure you that is one hundred percent not on purpose. But, if you would like to survive to see tomorrow and whatever thing you have with Pyrrha, you will open this door."

"What thing does he have with Pyrrha?" Pyrrha called from inside, her voice hitching.

In a true regard for self-preservation, Jaune did the one thing he could. He let the door swing open freely, quickly stepping out of the angry girl's way as she stomped into the room.

"I know you took it and I want it back. Nora, give him to me now."

"I don't have anything!" Nora shouted, waving her arms about. "Wait, him?"

"Yes. I know you have Zwei. Not that I mind you terrorizing the dog, but if Ruby returns and she found out you killed it with… whatever you do to your team, I will be in so much trouble." Her eyes narrowed. "That means that you will be in so much trouble."

"Ooohhh! Why didn't you just say so!" Nora cried happily. "I wouldn't hurt a feather on poor Zwei's doggy head. He is just too cute for that! Did you know that when he wakes up he makes the most brilliant sloth noises?"

"So, Zwei is still alive?" Hope filled Blake's heart. Only to disappear when Nora shrugged.

"No idea. He isn't here."

"What do you mean by isn't here?"

"Don't have Zwei."

"how could you not have Zwei! What was with you keeping me out of the room?"

"That was…. Something else?"

"What else did you take from me…" At once, she felt Nora's hands on her shoulder, shouting at her as she pushed her backwards.

"Port! I think Zwei is with the professor! Go Blake! Go catch that evil man!" With a final shove, Nora pushed Blake out of the room and back into the hall.

No time to think about that. Zwei was in trouble! Worse, Zwei was with Professor Peter "The Dullard" Port. Zwei was being tortured!

Like a mad-woman, Blake stampeded through the hallway, out into Beacon's courtyard and into the professor's classroom.

Only to find a happy dog, sitting patiently on the professor's desk.

"And then, with my trusty pocket-protector, I slew the thirty-ninth beowolf of the night! What does that make it again?"

Zwei yipped.

"Right, right That makes thirty-nine beowolves, eleven ursa and an innumerable amount of creeps. Not to mention outrunning a goliath! What a night, my furry companion. But such a manly night befits one as brave as I! Oh! Miss Belladonna, I was not expecting you. Did we have a meeting this jolly afternoon?"

Blake strode up carefully to the professor and dog from hell.

"No, professor. I was just looking for my friend's dog, Zwei. Seems you found him."

"I sure did lass! Zwei here was a most excellent listener! I regailed him with many a tale of my most daring exploits. I even took his opinion of which I should reveal to your class! He was such a fine helping hand today, I might even bring him on as an assistant! Say, boy? How does that sound? Would you like to be an assistant professor? One as strong and brave such as you no doubt knows how to keep an unruly class in check."

Zwei barked, a tongue dangling from his open mouth. Blake managed to groan at the same time, a heavy hand smacking her forehead.

"It has been a pleasure! Zwei, Miss Belladonna, I will see you both in my class after the break! Cheerio!"

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"Jeez, that was a close one!" Jaune said, panic still clinging to his voice.

"See? I knew Blake wouldn't find out. You just had to trust me as much as Renny does!" nora replied, a smile plastered to her face.

"Next time, please refrain from eating and reading at the same time." Ren commented, turning to gaze at the novel underneath Nora's bed. A one 'Ninjas of Love, volume 1', covered in syrup, sprinkles and at least three glasses of milk.

"It'll be fine!" Pressed the short redhead, waving off her partner and team leader. "All we need to do is clean it before Blake finds out! Someone get me a toothbrush, bleach and a bathtub of glitter glue!"

Jaune's head hit the wall. This was going to be a long day.

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**The longest one yet! I know, I know. All of these are pretty short chapters, and there are only three left!**


	6. In Which Zwei Becomes A Huntsman

**Crossoveraddict67 - Thank you! I hope you enjoy this one too.**

**IanAlphaAxel - Fluffy! Not fat! Thanks. :)**

**Chinaluv - You gotta up your pun game! It's a pun-ishment for not pun-ching me for my pun-datiry. I did post this chapter on time though, so at least I'm... (someone please help me stop) pun-ctual.**

**Konstantinsen - I'm surprised this premise isn't use more! **

**Wooh! Get your Cats and Dogs fix with chapter number six!**

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Professor Ozpin was enjoying his fourth morning coffee at his desk, before he would be forced to start this morning's workload. The piles of paperwork sitting off to the side left the weary headmaster grumbling into his drink, letting the coffee's steam fog his spectacles. Sometimes he wished he was a little more like that drunken bird Qrow. He could really use a flask just about now.

Placing the cup down, now half empty, Ozpin pulled a stack towards himself and shuffled them into order, lightly bouncing them on the desk to straighten the loose papers. He started by reading the title.

'_Economic Investments into the Wellbeing of Students Through the Use of- _'

Ozpin felt his forehead hit the table. It was just going to be one of those days. He moaned and let loose a few choice words which he learned over his incredibly long lifetime. Letting out the last of his complaints, he rose and proceeded to his work. Better to do it now rather than later. One never knew when more pressing matters came up.

Shifting in his seat, the headmaster got to work reading and signing. Signing and reading. Some coffee sipping, but mostly signing and reading. He looked out from his floor to ceiling window at the Beacon grounds below. Students were enjoying themselves out in the courtyard, without a care in the world. No homework for them to do. No paperwork to keep them inside. Just sunshine and relaxation and joy and-

Ozpin shook his head. No, that was a bad train of thought. He had to focus on his work.

Skimming through the words, Ozpin decided that there was nothing worse on this planet than mountains of paperwork. He would give anything to be back in the field. Killing grimm with a swing of his cane. But no, he had to decide that being Beacon's headmaster was the best way to spend his time.

Signing whatever document he was on, he pushed away one finished stack of work and pulled forward a new one. As he read the title, he raised an eyebrow. Now this was much more interesting. He could not believe that it was already time for his time sign off on huntsmen licenses for the graduating students at Beacon whom had passed their exams.

Much more interesting work. Opening a side drawer to his desk, he lifted out a box containing blank identification cards. Picking up a single card from the box, he placed it down beside him. With a special pen, he wrote out the date and signed his name on the card, then through his computer, scanned the identification card to link it to the global huntsmen database. Now, all the graduate would need to do is place his finger on the identification card and it would be synced to him and his scroll. A pretty efficient system. So much better than writing out all the paperwork for each individual student. He placed the finished unassigned card onto his left side and picked up the next card, going through the exact same process.

THUMP.

Ozpin raised his head from his task, staring at the door to his office.

Strange. Maybe he just imagined it. Lowering his head, he went back to his work, placing another card onto the pile.

THUMP.

Okay, he was definitely not imagining things. "Please come in," he called to whichever student was waiting for him. A few seconds of silence followed. The door remained closed. Ozpin shrugged and continued his work. It was not a rare occurrence for a student to get cold feet before speaking with him. He was the headmaster as well as a talented huntsman in his own regard.

THUMP.

He put down his pen. Now it was getting annoying. He stood from his desk and marched to the other side of his office, hand on the doorknob.

THUMP.

Ozpin twisted the knob and opened the door just a fraction-

The door swung open as Ozpin was thrown to the side. A tiny ball of fur barked crazily, tossing up papers and books whever he went.

"BARK BARK BARK BARK!" Zwei barked eagerly.

"I am so sorry headmaster!" Blake Belladonna called out, rushing into the headmaster's office trying to catch the animal.

Blake threw herself forward, her arms wrapping around the dog, only for it to sneak out of her grasp, jumping over her head and onto her back.

Ozpin could only stand there and watch in light amusement as the talented first year huntress in training was outmaneuvered by the creature the size of his head. Zwei barked like mad, barrelling forwards, narrowly missing the headmaster's head in what could have been nothing less than a perfect surprise attack.

Paperwork was floating through the air, keeping off the floor thanks to the winds made by Zwei and Blake's chase. Blake tripped, a piece of loose paper smacking her in the face, blinding her to Zwei's lcik of her ear as he jumped off of the desk.

"I'm so sorry!" Blake shouted. "Zwei get back here! No, stay away from the professor's cabinet!"

Zwei in his wisdom proceeded to do the exact opposite, smacking sideways into the cabinet, knocking over a priceless ceramic cup. Blake leaped to the rescue, catching the cup moments before it would have shattered.

"Woof!" Zwei called out happily, jumping onto the top ledge of the cabinet, rushing into other items, sending them flying.

With expert finesse and skill, Blake caught each of the flying items. A bowl, a trophy, a framed picture of all the huntsmen academy headmasters. An uncut piece of fire dust.

Ozping smiled faintly at the girl's actions. Still chasing after the dog, shouting at him to calm down, all while carrying a growing pile of the headmaster's things. This was definitely a better way to spend the day than looking over paperwork. He would have Glynda reorganize the files for him.

Zwei jumped onto Ozpin's desk and for once the headmaster darted forward. "Ms. Belladonna! Keep him from the-"

"Bark Bark Bark!" Zwei shouted, drowning out the headmaster's warning as he knocked over the box of unsigned identification cards and through the pile of completed cards.

Ozpin grumbled, running his hands over his face and through his hair. At least the dog did not decide to pick up one of the cards.

"bufk bufk!" Zwei barked with a mouthful of identification cards. Just as quickly as he entered, Zwei flew from the room.

Blake's running slowed as she stopped in front of the headmaster, panting wildly, hands on her knees.

"Sorry… for… that…"

Ozpin proceeded to his desk and picked up his cup of coffee. Still somehow standing after the disruption -disaster- to his office. Taking a slow sip, he replied, "that is quite alright Miss Belladonna."

"Sorry, I'm supposed to be looking after Ruby's dog until she returns. Headmaster? What did Zwei take from your office?"

Ozpin looked out towards the wide open door.

"Just a huntsman identification card. Hopefully it was not one of the completed unassigned cards."

"What would happen if it was?"

"Then Ruby's dog would be an identified huntsman. Along with all the perks that come with it."

In the distance, they heard the roar of a bullhead. Both turned to the window where a bullhead was flying in the most unusual way. Upside down for one.

"Bark bark!" they heard.

"What was that?"

"Well, identified huntsmen ARE allowed to requisition beacon's bullheads for their own use."

Blake smacked her forehead, grumbling.

"I'll go catch him before he crashes."

"Please do. Bullheads are not the cheapest of equipment."

As Blake Belladonna left the headmaster's office with her head down, Ozpin could only sip his coffee and chuckle. There had to be a reason why he wanted to be a headmaster. The hijinks of students was indeed one of those reasons.


	7. In Which Zwei Bests the Invincible Girl

**chinaluv - Practice makes perfect!**

**IanAlphaAxel - Happy you enjoyed the chapter. It'd be so scary to see a dog flying your plane. That reminds me of a joke! Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a muffin! Ha! *gets punched in the face* Worth it.**

**Konstantinsen - I always loved Ozpin as a troll. He just always seemed to have that vibe to him. Like he was only the headmaster because he wanted to see all his students commit wild hijinks. No wonder Team RWBY never gets in any trouble. They must be a never-ending well of amusement.**

**bookwyrm321 - Senseless destruction is Zwei's specialty! That and breaking through Weiss's icy exterior.**

**Oh heaven! Nothing fun rhymes with Chapter Seven!**

* * *

"I am sick and tired of this dog!" Blake shouted, barging into Team JNPR's room as they were changing. "I'm taking a me day. He's your problem now!"

With that comment and a heavy toss of Zwei, Blake slammed the door shut. Team JNPR could only stare at the door which still echoed in their ears. Now sitting patiently on the floor, as if being chucked into a room was a common occurrence, was Zwei.

"Bark!" Zwei said, wagging his tiny, stubby tail with vigour, looking at each of the teens in front of him.

Jaune was the first to speak, doing so after a long, drawn out sigh and a shake of his head. "I guess we're in charge of Ruby's dog for the day. Anyone have any ideas?"

"I was on my way to the sparring arena; you all can join me if you'd like." Pyrrha said, wrapping her arm in her usual white tape before placing her metal wrist guard overtop.

A collective hum of agreement followed and the team of four, plus a cute, jumpy dog made their way to the training arena. Signing in and activating the arena, Pyrrha stood inside, allowing the mechanisms to read her aura and project it on the overhead display.

"Bark!" Zwei barked happily, bouncing around the invincible girl as she made her way through her practice stances.

"Be careful Zwei," Pyrrha said, readjusting her footing so she did not inadvertently step on the tiny animal. She spun around, her spear transforming into a gun and crouching low to take out an imaginary target.

"Woof!" Zwei jumped up in front of the weapon, licking the muzzle. He growled at the girl once she turned in the other direction, paying him no mind.

"I think he wants to play with you!" Nora shouted cheerfully. "Come here little Zwei-Zwei! Mama Nora's got some loving to give you!"

Jaune laughed and even Ren cracked a miniscule grin when Zwei shook his head, leaving Nora pouting. With a bark and a mischievous grin, he circled around back to Pyrrha's carefully placed stances and powerful strikes. She grunted as her blade narrowly missed the dog as she lost track of him.

"Zwei! Please be careful!" She warned. Standing up, she shook off her hands and rolled her neck of any tightness. "Okay, can somebody please help me with him? Just for a few minutes so I can finish."

"You look like you're handling him well, Pyr." Jaune laughed, watching Zwei run through his partner's legs, flicking his tiny tail every which way.

"Please!" Pyrrha complained, reaching down and narrowly missing the dog as he slipped from her grasp. "You are a tough one to get a hold of aren't you."

"Oof!" She grunted, falling onto her stomach. She looked down. No Zwei was under her as she had hoped. A glint of competition flickered in her eyes. As did a small smile emerged on her lips. "You cannot escape me, little pup."

"Nora," Jaune whispered, "get your camera."

"Way ahead of you," Nora replied, already flipping to the camera app on her scroll. This was almost as good as Zwei's staring competition. Of course, it would end a very different way. Pyrrha was just too good. Too fluid in her movements.

"Ack!" Pyrrha gasped, spinning in a circle after the dog.

It was only a matter of time until Zwei grew too tired. Pyrrha was an amazon warrior. A body perfectly tuned and trained to handle even the quickest of opponents.

"Umf, Zwei get off of my back!" Pyrrha back-flipped trying to dislodge the twenty-five pound dog. In a feet of true canine strength, his paws clamped hard onto her shoulders and the two landed still very much attached together. Zwei let out a hot breath on the redhead's neck, followed by a yip of enjoyment and a lick.

"Gross!" The Invincible Girl whined, trying to wipe away dog slobber from her neck and collar bone. Only for it to be reapplied with as much vigour.

Nora laughed, grabbing her stomach with a free hand. "Come on Pyrrha! Beat the dog! Nobody can beat you!"

With monumental effort and only a little bit of swearing coming from the stoic warrior, Pyrrha managed to dislodge Zwei from her back. "I shall not underestimate my opponent, little pup. I shall catch you and remove you from this arena so I can complete my practice. If you behave, I shall endeavour to take you on a walk befitting your cuteness. Is that fair?"

Zwei yipped in agreement, cocking his head left then right.

"No more playing nice." Pyrrha darted forwards at an incredible speed, her semblance pulsing through Zwei's dog collar, keeping him still. Zwei, sticking out his tongue and panting happily, watched as Pyrrha barrelled ahead, arms outstretched with a smile of victory on her face.

She stepped closer, closer. She was right on top of him.

"Ouch!" She gasped, landing on her elbows. She looked around. "How?"

"Bark!" Zwei commented from the other side of the arena. Pyrrha gazed in amazement, first at the dog, then at her teammates, who could only stare back in amazement, shrugging in reply.

"That's it!" Pyrrha pressed her attack. The two chasing each other around the arena, panting hard. Zwei barked, rushing through Pyrrha's legs. Pyrrha grunted as Zwei wriggled from her grasp, up and over her head.

"Can. You. Just. Sit. Still!" Pyrrha gasped between attacks.

"Go get her! Give 'er the old one two! One two I tells ya!"

"Nora, I thought we were cheering on Pyrrha," Ren said.

"That was before Zwei started kicking her butt!" Nora shouted, swinging her fists around.

"Don't worry Pyr! I'm still rooting for you." Jaune called out.

Pyrrha stopped, panting hard, cheeks flushed. "Thanks… Jaune… It means so much to hear you say-"

"Kick her while she's distracted!"

"Woof!"

With another whirl through her legs, Pyrrha tripped, rolling out of the ring.

BEEP!

Pyrrha, Jaune, Ren and Nora looked up at the cause of the sound. The arena's fight tracker had called for the match to end. The screen buzzed with light, announcing to the world that Pyrrha had been defeated by arena knock-out.

"Wah?"

A small chuckle erupted from Ren of all people. "I guess Zwei of all people and pets in this school was able to defeat the invincible girl."

* * *

**I hope this chapter was okay. Not my favourite of this series and it's a tricky one to get right. Ahh! Just one more to go! That's insane! Thank you all for sticking through this with me. You all deserve a cookie!**

***No Ruby! These aren't for you! Hands off the reader cookies! Back! Back I say! ... No, you can't use your powers of cuteness to defeat me. I have a little sister. I'm immune! No. Not the puppy-face next to Zwei's puppy-face! Cuteness overload!***

**I'm sorry everyone. I don't have any cookies left to give you. Here, have some strawberr-ack! Ruby get off of me!**


	8. In Which Ruby and Yang Return Home

**Bookwyrm321 - Ever since thinking up this story, I always pictured Nora as the camera woman. She seems like the type of person who would film Blake making a fool out of herself (as well as anyone else she can get her camera on) and then use the videos as her own personal gag reel, rather than blackmail.**

**IanAlphaAxel - Happy to see you enjoyed the last chapter. I'm still unsure of how I feel about that one. Definitely the weakest of the lot in my mind. I might go back some time in the future and rewrite it if it continues bugging me.**

**chinaluv - Yes! A return to puns! you made me smile during a very serious meeting (which I should have been paying attention to), and have random looks directed my way. I might just need to try my hand at a Yang-centric story and follow her on her puntastic adventures.**

**Oy mate! It isn't too late to save the date and advocate to reduce the wait for another chapters... something that rhymes with wait! Here be the final chapter! Chapter eight!**

* * *

The bullhead landed softly on the tarmac, sending light plumes of dust and leaves into a frenzy around the vehicle. As the doors opened, two sisters stepped out laughing with each other and just enjoying each other's company. The tall blonde was shaking the younger redhead's shoulders.

"You can't try to add a flamethrower to Crescent Rose again! Not after how mad professor G got."

"But Yang!" Ruby whined, "I promise I got the ratio of blast dust to pressurized air right this time! I carried the one and everything."

"Do you need me to show you the new sign outside Beacon's forge?"

Ruby shook her head. She knew what it said by heart: _No Flamethrowers, Fire-blasters or any other fire propellant weaponry can be built in this facility Especially you Ruby Rose._

It almost made her proud to know that that sign would be hanging there for all time. It was like she was already famous! Maybe she should try something else. Maybe an ice-thrower! She was partners with the ice queen herself after all. Maybe it was worth looking into. It wouldn't be breaking any rules…

Maybe it was best to only let Yang know about that after she accidentally destroyed the forge. Again.

"How do you think Blake is doing?" Ruby said, changing the topic in the most obvious way. Yang couldn't help but chuckle.

"Judging by the vids Nora keeps sending me? I think she's having a great time!"

Ruby perked up, bouncing in front of Yang. "Really?" She squealed, "you think Blake and Zwei are best buddies now? Hang on… what videos did Nora send you and why did I not see them?"

Yang tugged at her collar. "Erm, no reason. I just wanted you to see that Zwei and Blake were both okay before… before I showed you any of the good ones? Damn, cat's out of the bag. Kitty may have been ruffed up a little. You could say that Blake is feline bad about the whole situation. Let me tell you the tail-"

"Yang!" Ruby shouted, climbing up her sister's arm to cover her mouth. "That is way too many puns in a row. And don't think you were able to change the conversation, missy. I want to see those videos. Even if it means me throwing Weiss at you to do it."

Yang chuckled. "Don't worry about anything. Blake is probably hiding from Zwei. Or had Zwei locked up in the closet."

"Or the bathroom!" Ruby giggled.

"Kitty cat probably threw Zwei into the cafeteria and just let him go wild on the students."

"I really hope that Zwei left some cookies for me…" Ruby thought about it for a moment before letting loose a shudder which Yang could only deem as one of the cutest things she had ever seen. Just behind Ruby sneezing and ahead of Weiss's angry glares.

The two stepped into the dormitory, still laughing and thinking up places for Blake to hide from their little ball of happiness. Ruby placed her scroll on the Team RWBY door, unlocking it with a pleasantly familiar click.

The door squeaked as it opened. Ruby and Yang stuck their heads through the doorway and peered into their room. It was quiet. Nothing seemed too badly out of place. Except for their mattresses surrounding Blake's bed in a collapsed makeshift fort.

"Pfft." Yang laughed; hearing Blake flip a page of her book. "How ya doing kitty? Dog got your tongue?"

"Did Zwei behave like a good boy." Ruby quipped. She broke out into her own bout of laughter as she heard Blake's scowl.

"It couldn't have been that bad. Like, I know Zwei is a special guy but he just likes attention and people petting him. He calms down after a good tummy rub."

"You had to tell me that now?" Blake whined, "that could have saved my life this passed week! Do you know what I had to do to calm him down?"

"Chase him through the school?" Ruby guessed.

"More like be chased through the school." Yang's smile could not fade. Her kitty cat had spent a week with a dog. The joke opportunities! They were endless! So many possibilities it was hard to know where to begin.

"So, do you think Blake could live with Zwei in our room now?" The little redhead asked.

"Nah, Blake is definitely still purr-trefied of him. I can't even find him!"

"You do know I'm right here. You can ask me. Yang, what did we tell you about puns?"

"Blake is totally too scared to even speak about Zwei. She's shaking under the covers!" Ruby laughed playfully. "Should we ask Zwei how Blake was?"

Yang shook her head seriously. "Can't ask Zwei his opinion. Better to ask Blake. Remember Ruby as much as we love him, Zwei is still a dog. A dog is a canine, but a cat is a purr-son!"

Both Ruby and Blake groaned.

The two sisters heard a faint Zwei-like whine. Looking up at Blake for the first time, they noticed something was off. For one, Blake looked to be in a terrible mood while reading, which just never happened.

For another, Zwei was lying down, curled up into a tight ball resting on top of her head. Holding back their laughter, Yang pointed up at Zwei.

"Care to explain?"

Blake shrugged. "He won this round of chess."

* * *

**And there you have it, the end to this story. Thank you all so much for reading and I really hope you enjoyed it. This has become my most viewed and reviewed story to date and that just fills me with the warm and fuzzies. Thank you all!**

**As always, I live for correcting my writings, so I'd love to know what you thought of Cats and Dogs, as well as any spelling/grammar mistakes you found in any of the chapters. To date, this is my longest fanfiction story. I know it's not much, but I'm just so happy that I was able to post consistently.**

**Next week I will be posting the start to my next multi-chapter story titled Rhodopis in Remnant. I hope to see you all there.**


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